Tuesday

Today I spent some time outside with my dogs because the weather is absolutely beautiful. I felt a little bad for my dog buddy because he has to go out on a leash and get hooked up so he doesn't run off. He always runs off to visit the neighbor dogs and doesn't come back when we call for him. The only way to prevent this is to hook him up to his leash, unfortunately. It probably bothers me more than it does him, but I don't know. Lady seems to gloat when he is on a leash and she has free rein of the yard. She runs past him really fast with a big stick in her mouth as if she is bragging and rubbing it in. :-) I was thinking today if my dogs were human children, Buddy would be my son who always is in trouble, getting detentions, getting suspended and making me crazy. Lady on the other hand would be my daughter who gets straight A's, never does anything wrong and doesn't talk back! Hehe! :-)

I started the 5 day orientation yesterday and so far so good. Hopefully I pass the two tests and move on to the next phase. :)

Its Friday

My trip to Chicago is quickly approaching, but things aren't going quite as planned. When I called to reserve amtrak tickets for Stephanie and I, they didn't have a seat available for an attendant, just one space for a wheelchair. So, because I have no intentions of going solo, the amtrak trip will have to wait and we will catch a ride with Steve to Chicago instead of meeting him there. :)

Today I went to a disability and healthy relationships meeting. The speaker, who has a disability herself, was a hoot to listen to. I think the talk of sex and intimacy in a room full of people is rather uncomfortable, but she was so funny to listen to that she made it easier for some people to participate in the conversation. She also talked about caregivers, abuse, disability myths, etc. Anyway, it was interesting.

On Wednesday (June 30) I start the 5 day orientation for the support position I applied for. We take two tests during the orientation and if I pass both tests I will move on to do the background check and drug test....keep your fingers crossed! :)

Happy Belated Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all the dad's out there and especially to my dad whom I miss very much! We were very fortunate because we spent many Father's Days together and I'm grateful for each and every one we shared together. :) RIP dad!

My car accident fell on Father's Day in 1992. The date was June 21st, which is todays date. I have been a quadriplegic for 18 years and I can't believe how fast 18 years goes by. Its scary!! The date of my accident used to bother me a bit, but not anymore. Its just another day, but one I give a little more thought to...first day of summer, longest day of year, the date of my accident. :) Last year I composed a letter to the man who was driving the van that collided with my truck. For some reason I wanted him to know how well I was doing and how much I loved my life and how I wasn't angry with him. When I put it in the mail I knew there was no turning back and I felt nervous because I had no idea how he would feel getting a letter from me.

A couple weeks later he wrote me back the kindest letter and said he was glad to hear from me. :) He said his biggest regret after the accident was following his lawyers advice and not sending me a card or getting in touch with my family to check on my progress. Anyway.... :)

Interview

Yesterday I had a telephone interview with the same company I have worked with for the past two tax seasons, but for a different position. The position I applied for is customer support. The interview went well and the next step is to complete a one week orientation/class on the computer. If (after) I successfully complete that and become certified I will need to take a drug test and get a background check. After the comes back clean and clear I will sign up for a 5-week training course in August. So, wish me luck!! :)

My chicago trip is approaching quickly and I'm getting excited. On Monday we got our instructions on what information we need to collect from vendors and which work shops we have to attend, etc. It looks like we will have spare time in the afternoons and evenings to do our own thing. I still have 3 weeks before I leave, but I'm all ready packing a little bit here and there. :)

ClassicFest

Saturday we drove to Cleveland to attend Classicfest at Nelson Ledges Quarry Park, which Terrapin Moon was scheduled to play at around 11:00 in the evening. Before them, there were classic rock tribute bands for Pink Floyd, Rush, Beatles and Ozzy Ozbourne. They all sounded great and we had a lot of fun! :) There was also a laser light show in the end, which was cool to watch, especially in the trees.

I met Thumper I-lean, the special needs kitten I want to adopt and call my own!!! OMG this kitty is so adorable and energetic I don't think he/she knows its missing a leg! He/She (still unsure of gender) is a bundle of energy! Unfortunately, I have decided bringing the kitten here is not a good idea. The kitten would need to be separated from my dogs (secluded by itself) at first and be gradually introduced over time. That isn't fair to the kitten. That baby has been through enough, I can't inflict any more stress on him. The owners said they will go ahead and keep it then and I can come visit him/her anytime. :)

Another weekend gone by

Wow, this past week has flown by! As some of you may have read on facebook, this week I was (and continue to be) consumed by a little precious kitten I have the opportunity to make a home for here! This little furry cuddle bug was stepped on by a horse (ouchie) and it did a lot of damage to his back side; therefore, one of his back legs needed to be amputated. :( I'm having a terrible time trying to talk my bf in to it..he is not budging at all! This might be a battle I don't win. I am doing research on the internet on how to introduce a new kitten to a home that has a dog, or two dogs in my case, so I am confident it can work. I'm not worried about Lady, its Buddy that concerns me. He is territorial and won't adjust as easy as Lady. As I type this, I am questioning myself. Am I being rational by wanting to adopt this kitty? Is it fair to my bf? my dogs? my caregivers? I have talked to each of my caregivers and they say they don't mind helping with the litter box. Are they just saying that though? Hmmmmm....I do plan to meet the cuddle bug Tuesday and I will do an update here. :)

What else? My friend's daughter is pregnant and getting induced tomorrow. Friend, if you read this, know I'm thinking of you and your daughter and I will be patiently waiting for your e-mail saying the baby has arrived! :)

Steve had a gig in Columbus Friday and it was a good time. He played with Skeleton Crew and the other band that played was The Bug Hounds. The keyboarder, Bill Kurzenburger, had his cd released that night so it was a party to celebrate his success. :) The door man said I wasn't allowed to drink because I didn't have my ID with me, but I snuck a beer in when he wasn't looking. Just one, that's all. :)

Happy Memorial Day

First, a thank you to all the soldiers who (and who have) put their lives on the line for our country and continue to do so regardless of the unsteady and volatile nature it is in. Happy Memorial Day!

Family is still here, but they are leaving tomorrow to go back home to Delaware. The visit went fast just like it does every time they come, but I think they are visiting again in July. Steve's Mom and I took a trip to Springhill nursery on Saturday, but didn't buy any flowers because we had all ready bought what we wanted at Walmart. :) They helped Steve paint the outside of the Florida room this weekend as well as helped hang my barn star on the front of the house by drilling a hole in the mortar. Thank you guys! :)

I lost sleep last night worrying about the skin graft on my cheek! It seems ripply and not smooth like skin should be. I am hoping its just healing and this is normal. I am going to do a google search on the care of skin grafts and what to expect afterwards when I get home tonight. :/

Well, I am going to get ready to go now! Have a great day!

Company

Steve's Mom and Dad arrived yesterday evening and will be here until after Memorial Day weekend. I'm not sure what all we will be doing while they are visiting, other than a cook out at our friend's house, but we will play it by ear each day like we normally do. :)

They both worked hard in the flower beds by pulling weeds, trimming back the bushes and lambs ear, planting grasses and laying mulch most of the day until the rain and hail forced them back inside. They like to keep busy, thats for sure and I'm definitely not complaining. :)

I learned today that HB 55 for animal cruelty passed in to legislation, which means cruelty to animals is no longer a misdemeanor in Ohio. I was glad to read this on facebook because cruelty to animals disgusts me to no end and I cannot fathom how or why anybody in their right mind could harm an animal. Most animals are innocent, love unconditional and have no voice. I do have my doubts that it will minimize the cruelty to animals in Ohio, though. I hope I'm wrong!

Weekend is about over

Last night we went to J-Alan's and listened to the band, which was an interesting evening. It was a good time for the most part, just interesting. There was one individual (very nice btw) who consumed a little too much alcohol and was really annoying the hell out of my friend and I. He probably didn't realize how annoying he was though, because he had consumed too much alcohol. Make sense? I guesss these things happen, but it certainly makes the night less enjoyable. We thought that avoiding eye contact with him would deter him from continuously coming over, but it didn't. He was like a turd that won't flush, kept coming back. Ugh! Anyway... :)

Today was such a perfect day weather wise. I took my babies outside for an hour and we just sat in the drive way absorbing the sun shine and feeling the breeze. Buddy and I were entertained for a while watching Lady play with a tree branch. She always grabs the sticks that are quadruple her size in length and then she gets angry and vicious sounding when she can't maneuver it or it drags on the ground. :(

I go for another follow up appointment with the surgeon tomorrow. I cancelled last Wednesday as I wasn't feeling the love of going in the nasty weather, cold and damp, sitting in the waiting room with all the other people who shared my same 1:45 appointment slot. Cancelling and staying home seemed like the right thing to do at the time. :)

Weekend is here

This Saturday I'm going to J-Alans to listen to Steve play with the band Skeleton Crew. He has only been in this band a short time so I have only heard him perform with them once, but their music is similar to the other band he is in, Terrapin Moon. Terrapin Moon is a Grateful Dead Tribute Band so they rarely play something other than what the dead did, but Skeleton Crew does do other songs by other bands. (Bob Marley, Bob Dylan, etc.)

I'm getting eager for my trip to Chicago. My nurse and I are pretty sure we are taking the amtrak out of Cincinatti the night before we have to attend the abilities expo, but we just have to make sure that when we get to Chicago we understand how to take the bus and train to the hotel which is 26 miles away. We will have some "walking" to do in between bus routes and we also want to find out what kind of neighborhood we will be in. :)

Family is visiting this week. Steve's parents are coming out Wednesday and will be here through Tuesday. I'm not sure what is on the agenda, but one day we hope to make a trip to Springhill Nursery in Tipp City.

I guess that is all for now. Have a great weekend! Hopefully this weather gets nice soon. Yesterday was a beautiful day, but we need more days filled with sunshine and warmth!

Chair IS fixed

I failed to mention in my last post that my wheelchair did get fixed Tuesday!!! It ended up being a wire problem and if it happens again, they will replace it with a new one. So, I'm happy to have my "get up and go" working again! :) Thank you to those who asked about it!

My friend Leslie called me today very upset. She made the heart wrenching decision to have her 16 year old doggy put to sleep. She is going to the vet this evening at 7:30 to have it done, but she is hoping that CiCi (doggy's name) will go on her own at home before then. I can't imagine my life without my babies because my god they bring me so much happiness and they always make me smile, but when I think about the time when I may have to make the same decision Leslie made, it makes me sad! I don't dwell on that day because that is a very long time down the road (at least I think it is) but its still sad to think about.

As I have mentioned I have a couple new nursing assistants and it seems to be working out well. I have been training a new girl this week and I have to admit, its exhausting!! Its hard to teach someone how to do my routine, show her where everything is, explain how to make coffee, explain the remote controls, explain the hoyer lift, explain which buttons to push on my wheelchair to operate this and that when I cannot freaking point!!! I have a feeling in my sleep I will be saying... up, up, up, okay, now left, not your left, my left, okay good, now my right, no not that right, my other right.....

Vets office

Today I had to take Lady to the vet because the poor baby is itching like crazy! I also took Buddy because I'm a sucker and didn't want to take Lady Bye Bye and not him!!! I know, I'm too soft. It did work out in my favor though!

Anyway, the doctor ended up prescribing benadryl to ease her scratching and while she was there, she caught Lady up on her distemper shot, took a blood test for heartworm and sold me a years worth of heartworm medication. That meant Lady was caught up for a year. I told the doctor I was going to take Buddy to their vaccination clinic (there is no charge for the visit, just the vaccine) tomorrow evening and asked if the receptionist would tell me what he needs and she said, "yes". She then told me if I was going to the clinic to save the money for the visit, that she would waive his fee and do his shots and blood test while we were there! I agreed, thanked her a dozen times and got Buddy caught up, too! I spent $253.00, but they are good to go for a year! Woohoo!

Productive day

As I said in my last post my chair is on the fritz and not driveable. As much as it frustrates me being stuck in one place and not able to move around independently, it has sort of played in my favor today. I have gotten so much done today, it excites me! I have figured out the quarterly taxes, gotten paper work finished, completed tasks on my "to do" list, cleaned around my desk and made phone calls I needed to make. Yay! :)

Wheelchair guy is coming tomorrow to hopefully fix my chair. I hope he is able to fix it tomorrow, but he may need to order a part. We will see... :) I have had this chair for a year... isn't it too soon for malfunctions? Geez!

I booked our room for Chicago and am getting excited about going. Its still 2 months away, but something to look forward to. My nurse and I were thinking about taking the amtrak train from Cincinatti and meeting Steve there, but we have to see what they do about people in wheelchairs. Would I have to transfer to a regular seat? If so, where does my wheelchair go? etc...

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the ladies in my life who are Mommies!!! I hope you all have a beautiful day! My mom isn't with me anymore, but I'd like to think that some how some way she knows I'm thinking of her and she is heavy on my heart today! :)

Its been somewhat of a frustrating weekend as my wheelchair is on the fritz. I keep getting an error message on the control box each time I try to use the chin control! So everytime I want to move from one room to another, I am at the mercy of someone else!! Grrr! This chair is heavy enough by itself let alone having to push it WITH me in it! I am calling ATG rehab tomorrow to see if somebody can come fix it. Wish me luck! :)

I got some stitches out and two bandages off Friday. These were from the two areas he put the grafted skin. I wished I could say I'm happy with it, but its too early for that. Right now both areas look like road rash, that is the only way to describe them. I still have stitches around both ears, my jaw and chest, which will all hopefully come out Wednesday.

I went to my nephews tee ball and j ball games Thursday and had so much fun! I wore a perpetual smile watching them and all the other little dumplings play. The little ones on my younger nephew's team weren't quite as "coordinated" and not as "in to" the sport as my older nephew's team. They were climbing the fence, not listening to the coach, looking up at the sky, swinging there arms, worried about snacks... it was comical! :) Stephanie, my brother's wife e-mailed me the schedule for their games, so I will be attending more!!

Cinco De Mayo

Hi, Happy Hump Day and Happy Cinco De Mayo ! :)

My girly friend called me yesterday with an awesome request! She asked if Steve and I could drive to Chicago in July and spend a couple days at the abilities expo for her and her boyfriend. Her and her boyfriend run the Dayton chapter of the Independent Living Centers in Ohio and don't have the time to travel because of their busy work schedules.

She said she wants us to gather information, get ideas, talk to the vendors and meet people she has contacts with regarding how she can make the Dayton abilities expo more successful than it has been in the past.

I have never been to Chicago and it is on my "bucket list"....of course I said, "yes" :)

I feel MUCH better!

Today I got the huge bulky "helmet like" bandage off from around my head, so was able to get a hair wash and I feel like a new person! The doctor said not to wash my hair, but that wasn't going to happen. I have oily hair and need a good shampoo every day, so after 5 days, it was DEFINITELY time!! :) I go back Friday to get more bandages removed and I guess the stitches will come out next week. Yay!
Have a great day!

I feel a wine coming on!

The liquid/blended diet is getting old! I'm hungry and want real food! V8 juice, mashed potatoes, pudding and jello can only suppress my appetite for so long! My head still hasn't been scrubbed because I haven't been able to convince anybody that taking the guaze off around my head and shampooing my filthy hair and scalp is the right thing to do.

I did watch a great movie last night. I recommend "The blind side" to anybody who wants to watch a good movie. Not many movies capture my attention through the entire movie, but this one did! Sandra Bullock was funny and so was the little boy who played S.J...he was adorable!

I wanted to go to the benefit for Masterpiece last night at the Middletown Sportsman Club, but opted not to for reasons mentioned above. It was a quarter auction and the proceeds went to the Ohio SPCA. I hope there was a good turn out for the event!!

Okay, I'm going to go puree something and take another nap!

I'm home

Surgery was Thursday and I'm glad its over. :) Dr. Percy wouldn't let me go home afterwards because I was running a fever, so I stayed over one night. That definitely wasn't my preference, but it wasn't too dreadful, as the nurses and aides were very nice and accomodating.

Before surgery the anesthesiologist had a terrible time starting an I.V because my veins are so hard to find. I have never been an easy stick for blood draws and IVs, so it wasn't a huge surprise. He stuck me in both my arms, hands, ankles, my jugular and finally struck gold in my groin. (I know that didn't sound right, but I'm too lazy to change it). Maybe next time I should suggest starting in the groin? I take that back.. there won't be a next time!!

Dr. Percy removed skin and tissue from the two areas that had melanoma (my temple region and right cheek) and then took skin from behind both my ears and grafted that skin where he removed the melanoma. Hopefully when the bandages are off and the stitches are out I will be happy with the results despite the scarring it will leave on my face and neck. I'm not one to have liquid foundation put on me, but that could possibly change very soon!!

I think the worst thing right now is the copious amount of guaze around my head! It looks like I'm wearing a football helmet. The guaze got caught on my chin control yesterday, which sent me flying in to my desk, knocking over speakers, upsetting Nugget's tank, and knocking the desk in to the wall. Nugget wasn't none to happy....his fins were flared as he was flipping around the tank through all the bubbles, gravel and debris that was shuffled caused by the excessive and unnecessary amount of guaze I'm lugging around on my head. I have not gotten my hair shampooed since early Thursday morning and I'm going bonkers! I'm sure the oil from my hair will be seeping through the guaze soon if it hasn't all ready! My head feels disgusting!

Anyway...I'm going to take a nap!

Shallow

I know the ending of my vanity post was shallow and I need to elaborate. The tanning bed and the sun worshipping that I should not continue to do is not the reason I wished I didn't get the areas removed and biopsied...sometimes it just seems like the less we know the better. Many people, my father for one, do not see doctors because they don't want to know if something is wrong or are afraid of finding out something is wrong. I see that as being somewhat rational and I completely share that mind set. Maybe that is why I think its rational? :) When my dad did finally start to see a physician regularly and did his yearly exams, there was always something found that caused concern, looked abnormal, needed more testing, needed biopsied and whatever else. The scare that is instilled in a person every time they see a doctor is enough to say "I'm finished with doctors"

Luckily I haven't reached that point. Now that a couple days have passed I am ready to take the bull by the horns and get this shit over with. This week I will have the surgery and be optimistic everything will be fine. I'm dreading it, but doesn't everybody? :)

I will post after I'm home. Thank you for reading!

Vanity

I have always been a vane (sp?) person. When I was younger I wouldn't leave the house without makeup, my hair would always have to be curled in case I ran in to somebody I knew, my clothes couldn't be left over from the night before, bla bla bla. You get the picture, right? :) Well, 18 years later I'm as vane now as I was then. Having a big electric wheelchair attached to me hasn't changed the way I want to look and want others to see on the outside.
I decided about a month ago I wanted to get two lesions removed from my face because I didn't like the way they made me look. I wasn't concerned really, just wanted them gone. I went to my doctor, she referred me to a surgeon, and two weeks after that I was having out patient surgery to have 3 areas removed. The surgeon found another tiny one tucked up under my bangs in my temporal region.
What I thought would be a simple procedure and quick recovery, was quite the contrary. I was on a liquid diet for 5 days, half my face was bandaged up like I had been cut from my head to my neck, I now have a 2" scar on the side of my face, and another 1" scar on my temple. All of that because I wanted 2 eraser sized lesions removed because I'm vane!! After the fact I said, "I will never electively put myself through that mess again"
So, after a week of going to the office for follow up appointments, this past Friday I went to have the last bandage removed, get the last of my stitches removed and be done with the doctor visits and the trips to Kettering.
Well, unfortunately that didn't happen. When I got in his office, he took the bandage off and sat down. He opened his chart and said two of those lesions were melanoma and I have to have another surgery to remove surrounding tissue and get a skin graft. I was stunned. It's like I heard him talking, but I didn't hear a word he said because my thoughts were going rampid to say the least.
Am I fortunate I went to have the areas removed? Or am I unfortunate I went to have the areas removed? If I would have left it alone and not had them looked at, I would never know and I could go on with life and continue my life style of laying in the tanning bed and enjoying the sun. Now, that I do know, I would be an idiot to continue to enjoy those things and not deal with the here and now!
I'm hating life right now!